Constructive communication
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:- '''Needs''' have to be expressed. People are not able to read project managers' minds. Therefore, they have to tell them what they want or what is required of them <ref name="CoupleBook" />. | :- '''Needs''' have to be expressed. People are not able to read project managers' minds. Therefore, they have to tell them what they want or what is required of them <ref name="CoupleBook" />. | ||
| − | *Example of | + | *Example of complete communication: |
:- I am going to schedule a meeting next week. I hope you can attend it. I need to go over some email tricks with the department. It would be great if everyone will attend. | :- I am going to schedule a meeting next week. I hope you can attend it. I need to go over some email tricks with the department. It would be great if everyone will attend. | ||
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The incomplete communication is not entirely incorrect. However, it can confuse the receiving person, and the project manager might not end up with a desirable result. | The incomplete communication is not entirely incorrect. However, it can confuse the receiving person, and the project manager might not end up with a desirable result. | ||
| + | === Emotions Under Control === | ||
| + | It is normal to experience emotions during conflicts, and project managers need to have them under control. Communicating with anger is not constructive and will only make the situation worse. When emotions are not under control, regrettable things are likely to be said. On the other hand, when emotions are under control, the likelihood increases of finding a mutually acceptable solution. It also allows everyone to view the situation more objectively <ref name="12rules"> FirstCall. (23.08.2010). 12 rules for constructive communication. https://www.firstcalleap.org/2010/08/12-rules-for-constructive-communication/. Visited: 18/02/2021.</ref>. | ||
Revision as of 20:51, 18 February 2021
Abstract
Communication is a big part of project management. 80% of project managers' time is spent on communication, which is considered a critical success factor in projects [1]. Project managers communicate with stakeholders such as co-workers, clients, and business partners and these communications are, for example, regarding projects and for making big decisions. These types of communications and when dealing with all kinds of people, conflicts are inevitable [2].
For managing conflicts the right way, the communication has to be constructive and not destructive, as poor communication can make matters worse [3]. The majority of conflicts can be looked at as an opportunity for improvement [2]. Project managers that practice and learn to use constructive communication are more likely to transform conflicts into growth or improvement. In addition, they can build more robust and better relationships with their stakeholders and understand them better. Moreover, by following the guidelines on constructive communication, project managers can resolve potential conflicts ahead of time and prevent miscommunication [3].
This article examines the importance of constructive communication, especially in dealing with conflicts during projects. In addition, relevant models and guidelines are provided that project managers can use in their work. It is important for project managers to master and keep practicing constructive communication. However, this type of communication is not just relevant within project management. It is useful for everyone willing to learn how to deal with conflicts constructively [4].
Contents |
What is Constructive Communication
Constructive communication is a powerful tool to use when dealing with and to prevent conflicts. This type of communication addresses the conflict positively and clearly between communicators. It builds understanding, provides sufficient detail for full awareness, and provides clear information. Furthermore, by using constructive communication, the goal is that both sides win by showing a respectful and cooperative attitude. Using constructive communication leaves room for others to share their side and be heard to work together and foster understanding [4].
Models of Constructive Communication
There are different ways to use constructive communication. This section goes over five different models of constructive communication.
Nonviolent Communication
Clean Communication
Cooperative Communication
Centered Communication
Compassionate Listening
Guidelines for Constructive Communication
It can be tricky to use constructive communication when dealing with conflicts. In this section, guidelines and examples will be illustrated.
I-Statements Instead of You-Statements
Using I-statements when dealing with conflicts is much more subtle than using you-statements. Project managers are not accusing or making assumptions about the other person's attitude or feelings when using I-statements [2]. While, you-statements communicate that the other person is responsible for the project manager's discomfort and pain, which shuts the door to understanding and turns discussions into conflict. I-statements can identify both impacts and problems regarding the conflict and make it easier to find a solution [4].
- I-statement - Example of what to say:
- - I find it frustrating when we send out the wrong file to our clients
- You-statement - Example of what not to say:
- - You sent out the wrong file to our client
Three points can help project managers build their I-statements [2]:
- Declare the feeling regarding the behavior from the other person and its consequences
- Offer tangible, concrete examples of the effects of such behavior
- State what kind of behavior is more acceptable in the future
Be Clear and Specific
When solving a conflict or being on the receiving end, it is essential to be calm, clear, and specific. Doing so makes it possible to lead the conversation in a structured way and prevent misunderstandings from happening. Moreover, it is more likely to get all the information needed to solve the conflict where no one ends up getting hurt or feeling disrespected [2].
- Example of a clear and specific sentence:
- - I am a little frustrated that you sent out the wrong file to our client as it can confuse him/her.
- Example of a sentence that is not clear and specific.
- - You are confusing our client
Body Language Awareness
Communication is verbal, but it is also nonverbal, and both factors are vital in conversations. If the other person cannot read the body language, a big part of the conversation will be missing [5]. Additionally, it is crucial to pay attention to facial expressions, such as angry faces and rolling eyes. People might feel threatened when project managers use angry faces and bad postures during conflicts [4].
Examples to be aware of:
Focus on the Problem
It is much more effective to focus on the problem and not the person. Then the person responsible is approached to find a solution to the problem. Having the focus of the conversation on the problem can prevent future problems and conflicts from occurring and not focus on blame [3].
- Example of a sentence focusing on the problem:
- - Our client received an email with the wrong file
- Example of a sentence focusing on the person:
- - You sent out the wrong file to our client
Focus on the Future
If the focus is on the past, the person is more likely to be defensive and hurt. Consequentially, it can increase the conflict rapidly. It is much more constructive to have a focus on the future. However, if it seems impossible to forget the past issue, it should be resolved first and then continue on the conflict with the future in mind [2].
Manage the Conversation with Facts
Conflicts can involve many feelings, but project managers should manage them with facts, not feelings. The facts should be presented in a structured manner and not in a negative way.
- Example of a sentence with facts:
- - I was hurt when you said I was confusing our client after I sent out the wrong file
- Example of a sentence not with facts:
- - Why were you so mean to be?
Complete Communication
When communications are complete, they include observations, feelings, thoughts, and needs. Using these four elements helps to express all the information needed to help solve a conflict [6].
- - Observations are neutral factual claims where no inferences or judgments are allowed [6].
- - Feelings are an essential component in conversations. As mentioned before, problems should focus on facts, not feelings. However, project managers need to show feelings that describe their emotions, but in the right and constructively way [6].
- - Thoughts are views, opinions, theories, and situational perceptions. Although thoughts do not have to be 100% true all the time, they show a personal side and understanding from the project manager [6].
- - Needs have to be expressed. People are not able to read project managers' minds. Therefore, they have to tell them what they want or what is required of them [6].
- Example of complete communication:
- - I am going to schedule a meeting next week. I hope you can attend it. I need to go over some email tricks with the department. It would be great if everyone will attend.
- Example of incomplete communication:
- - I hope you can attend the meeting next week.
The incomplete communication is not entirely incorrect. However, it can confuse the receiving person, and the project manager might not end up with a desirable result.
Emotions Under Control
It is normal to experience emotions during conflicts, and project managers need to have them under control. Communicating with anger is not constructive and will only make the situation worse. When emotions are not under control, regrettable things are likely to be said. On the other hand, when emotions are under control, the likelihood increases of finding a mutually acceptable solution. It also allows everyone to view the situation more objectively [7].
Limitations
There are always some limitations and they will be discussed in this section.
Conclusion
The final chapter is a conclusion.
Annotated bibliography
* Nonviolent and Constructive Communication, Joanie V Connors, 2013 [4]. This paper focuses on the skills of communication and how to use constructive communication when dealing with conflicts.
* Communicating Constructively, Scott Williams, 2002 [3]. This article shows how you can apply constructive communication in various professions.
References
- ↑ J. Geraldi, C. Thuesen, \& J. Oehmen. (2017). Doing Projects - Nordic flavour to managing projects. Danish Standards Foundation. 96.
- ↑ 2.0 2.1 2.2 2.3 2.4 2.5 A. Benko. (26.06.2018). Constructive Communication Skills in the Workplace. https://softwaretester.careers/constructive-communication-skills-in-the-workplace/. Visited: 09/02/2021.
- ↑ 3.0 3.1 3.2 3.3 Scott Williams (NA). Communicating Constructively. http://www.wright.edu/~scott.williams/LeaderLetter/communicating.htm. Visited: 09/02/2021.
- ↑ 4.0 4.1 4.2 4.3 4.4 4.5 Joanie V. Connors. (2018). Nonviolent and Constructive Communication. https://l.cohousing.org/Constructive_Communication.pdf. Visited: 09/02/2021.
- ↑ 5.0 5.1 5.2 5.3 C. K. Goman. (26.08.2018). 5 Ways Body Language Impacts Leadership Results. https://www.forbes.com/sites/carolkinseygoman/2018/08/26/5-ways-body-language-impacts-leadership-results/?sh=3f167b73536a. Visited: 18/02/2021.
- ↑ 6.0 6.1 6.2 6.3 6.4 Matthew McKay, Patrick Fanning & Kim Paleg. (2006). Couple Skills: Making Your Relationship Work. Oakland, CA: New Harbinger Publications, 1994. 59-60.
- ↑ FirstCall. (23.08.2010). 12 rules for constructive communication. https://www.firstcalleap.org/2010/08/12-rules-for-constructive-communication/. Visited: 18/02/2021.
